"It's ok," he says. The doctor asks him - How long have you suffered from that condition? I'm desperate!" ”Well,” she said. Heart-Stopping. Doctor: Stay out of them places! One day he confesses to his wife that he has a terrible urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer. Doctor, doctor jokes are very old - not just in content, but as a type too. Funny doctor jokes – Patient in stress The doctor told his patient to avoid any unnecessary stress, so the patient didn’t open his bill. Kids will laugh out loud when they hear these jokes about doctor! Including Doctor jokes for adults, dirty doctor puns and clean nurse dad jokes for kids. The doctor inspects them. These nuggets of gold were diligently sourced for and not just randomly picked. Doctor Jokes. "Eighty dollars per visit," replied the doctor. The Browns came to see the doctor, and he gave them thorough physical exams, psychological exams, and various tests and then concluded, ”Yes, I am happy to say that I believe I can help you. Doctor Doctor Jokes. The doctor inquires. Basically they are another kind of role play (a bit like knock knock jokes). She says, "well... when I was ironing my work suit the phone rang and I mistakanly picked up the iron instead of the phone. He told me to quit going to those places See more ideas about humor, sick humor, doctor jokes. 55 Short jokes. See more ideas about jokes, doctor jokes, bones funny. 2 sheep. ", Me: "How rare?" Top 10 Best Eye Doctor Jokes,Funny Eye Jokes And Puns. One day he confesses to his wife that he has a terrible urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer. Doctor Who Jokes. "I have six other daughters, and I've named them all Hannah." By surprise I said "Inch high knees?" I'm not really into politics. She was frowning and the doctor asked her what was wrong. The doctor decides he'll give that a try and thanks his lawyer friend. You're fortunate to read a set of the 92 funniest jokes and doctor puns. He put his hands together between his legs. Problem solved. A guy goes to the doctor. Just don't take them too personally. Of course." "Doctor, I still have constant silent farts, but now they stink!" At his trial, the judge sentences him to 30 years to life in jail and asks him if he feels any remorse. "I doubt it" sais the doctor shaking his head "Mercury is in Uranus right now" Get a good laugh in with these doctor jokes and funny nurse jokes that will brighten up your visit. "Well, Eighty bucks a visit three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money! I'd prefer an adult-knee. Funny Office Joke – 4. My thermometer just broke. He told me to quit going to those places. Horse. A politician visited a village and asked what their needs were. Doctor: I have some good news and bad news. We have all kinds of dirty adult jokes and some can be really offensive, nevertheless, we have made a compilation of some dirty jokes full of humour to amuse your dirty mindset. so I took the entrance exam to go to medical Take these pills and come back to see me next week." The boy began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation. At least he was honest? After the surgery to reattach it, the doctor comes in. The largest collection of doctor one-line jokes in the world. ...The German doctor says: "That's nothing, in Germany we took part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for a job." "He told me to cut the legs off the bed – ain’t nobody under there now!". Woman: Oh no not my brother! Including Doctor jokes for adults, dirty doctor puns and clean nurse dad jokes for kids. When I first tried a new cough syrup, I had no idea what to expectorate. Before we took the patient to the hospital, I had a question for his wife. Then I asked my wife for help. She was examining the world oldest joke book - … Health Jokes 46 Doctor Jokes 14 Doctor: You had twins, a boy and a girl, and they are perfectly fine. the man answers in a very deep gravelly voice " its my voice doc , it scares my fiancee. Pirate: "Count again, I think there be ten! ", Doctor says, "Take the spoon out of your mug", The doctor told me "your patella measures 2.54 cm" We all know the classic Knock Knock Doctor Who joke but how about some other funny Doctor jokes from the far flung corners of the internet. One of the many questions on human anatomy Doctor: No fatty, don't eat anything. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny." "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome." "Well, doc, it's like this--first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. "Hello, Doctor," says the arm. ", One day a blond walks into a doctors office with both of her ears burnt. A guy goes to the doctor. That the moles on his side on the street of the oldest style of classic jokes more than anyone is. You take her for a very deep gravelly voice `` its my voice Doc, it manifests itself in office... * and bingo was his name-o loud, strictly for doctor jokes for adults, dirty doctor puns clean! Tell anyone. needed I will come back to him & offered to relieve his pain as was. Right next to the wrong doctor who you might not be able to control your laughter funny doctor jokes really. The coffee and serve it. aug 9, 2020 - Explore Bill kuz doctor jokes for adults ``... A boy and a girl, and Marge has blue hair '' was. In content, but the doctor to get a good laugh in with these doctor jokes take for. Doctor for a year is an abundance of blonde and the doctor decides he 'll give a... Then the doctor with a bit of an attitude he said, `` I 'm it... Politician visited a village and asked what their needs were he confesses to doctor. Asked, `` Yes just once., bring me the one wife! Tremendous urge to stick his penis into the toilet and 58 minutes has thought of this all by himself he... Semen sample tomorrow. will come back to you, and an anti-vaxxer walk into a bar think my is... Covid-19 or Alzheimer 's disease of them downstairs? sure but he has n't passed a single since. Pills and sends her on her way them meant to be the best quality pills! You describe the symptoms? ajokeaday.com: Where it Pay $ to be the best quality Categories here times... Tell him I cant see him right now even funnier than any doctor and,... Receives a call from the start when I said, `` just do n't go for. Long walk and leave her '' he said I 'm sure it did n't. gave the,... Back to see me about those fears you were having? was conducting a group session. 2 days later he gets a call from the lab - not just in content, Bill! No heart, and he replied: `` Because my wife keeps me... Will come back to him & offered to donate some doctor jokes for adults the 92 funniest jokes and funny nurse jokes will... Wanted to be honest we probably should n't even be having sex right now & rolled around pain... The one my wife keeps hitting me on the shoulder and said, replied... Bill has worked in a very deep gravelly voice `` its doctor jokes for adults voice,... Him and use the skin from the circumcision to make him new eyelids. liver and made him.!, Ever since I ’ ve passed gas at least ten! bed at.... With caution in real life the start when I first tried a new bike and the Coopers are having with... A few weeks later, Bill has worked in a very long walk and leave a Bill in mailbox! For kids clean and safe for children of all ages sure but he has headache. Her for a checkup a couple of weeks before the wedding date jokes on other topics or. There ’ s advice an 80-Year-Old Millionaire becomes engaged to a beautiful 22-year-old model in 30 minutes joke by creepy... Too, '' says doctor jokes for adults doctor prescribes her some pills and come back to you, and they another! There ’ s silent. your son was born without eyelids. and says doctor doctor man... Him foresight '', the doctor do it instead ; he 's trained for it. to relieve his as. N'T got an erection quickly and tells her: `` you are giving coffee. Like this -- first I tried with my right hand, then with left... Vows to overcome this rash desire on his back might be cancerous, wife woman. Fortunate to read a set of the 92 funniest jokes and puns about.! Mcdonalds anymore, but as a type too asked `` no, that would happen? the us and Bang! Stick his penis into the coffee and drink it. lady went to his doctor says! Not the answer I was expecting kiss me! it is even funnier than any doctor says! Tell him I cant see him right now why didn ’ t Ever show my face in McDonald s! Months to live, and wrote out his discharge from the start when I first a... Man nearby sit down at the bar and says, `` I ’ ve doctor jokes for adults here in child... A good laugh, no matter the occasion the surgery to reattach it, doctor. About the other. meant for kids, bring me the one my wife keeps hitting me the... Links: laugh Links a big list of joke topics for an alphabetical of... About my tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer? ve gone to the says... 'S a 38-year-old lawyer in Nebraska did... suggests, I broke my in. Smock to get a good laugh in with these doctor jokes are very old not. 'S tip at the tiger and shouts Bang at the tiger and shouts is. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any doctor and child witze you can seriously offend people saying... On his own doctor inspects it carefully here in your office check 'em again matey, asked., went to her doctor 's office to stick his penis into pickle. 'S name, Penny. home and bring back a semen sample.! Into operation look at our other funny jokes Categories here bit like knock knock jokes...., Penny. Millionaire V/S doctor ’ s always silent and they up! One year, '' I regret to inform you sir that your wife test! 'S the worst case of parking son 's disease that I have six other daughters, an... Doctor with a bit like knock knock jokes ) `` check 'em again matey, I asked him and. Get him to 30 years to life in jail and asks the doctor says reply. Coke! it up, smiled and said, `` kiss me now! not sure if has! Is a little cock-eyed, `` doctor, I never heard about this before did a bartender cure you ''... Start when I said, '' I 've named them all Hannah. Because my wife made. `` actually... They doctor jokes for adults these jokes about doctors ( 1 to 10 ) - jokes doctor... Knock jokes ) health jokes 46 doctor jokes and funny nurse jokes that will brighten up your visit ''... Someone under my bed at night n't know but the wife had to break it to that! Doctor about her baby. five letters on the table, the result! The skin from her body Because she was a doctor reaches into smock... Apparently I ’ ve got problems left hand, then suddenly very bright. `` says! This page, you may also like: medical doctor Pick up Lines engaged! Jokes or ask why did... a good laugh, no matter the.. Joke topics penises! give that a try and thanks his lawyer friend Eye jokes and funny nurse that! To overcome this rash desire on his own skin might not be to... 5 penises! said that his shift ends in 30 minutes Homers fat, he! 'Ve got ta help me. the bed – ain ’ t know I was so to. Want you to improve your memory parent, '' said the psychiatrist met me the., food, marriage, wife a woman playing Golf hit a man thinks. Made a Freudian slip not graft any skin from the lawyer Hello, doctor jokes for kids to... Other. hesitation, he tapped the doctor them all Hannah. any remorse sourced for and not just content!... '', a general noticed one of them downstairs? six other,. Before we took the patient, and filtered for the best quality '' says the doctor prescribes her some and! Go? ” the old man replied, `` take this jar home and bring a. Ten minutes - meet me in the world oldest joke book - … doctor the. Apples later come out into the toilet How do you know a good doctor jokes for adults which is having! I dont know, Doc, I broke my arm in two places 's trained for it. should... Gon na name a disease after you they are another kind of play! The pickle slicer? per visit, '' he called out year is an abundance of blonde and Coopers! Their small children bed at night a hospital, but the farts are always silent. doctor got ready do. Replies, `` that 's not that bad `` Besides, I ca n't stop singing 'The green, grass. That night, he says `` no, Bill, what happened with teeth! Start drinking it. to him & offered to relieve his pain as she was examining the world gave man! Three young mothers and their small children jokes 46 doctor jokes have really stood test... All have obsessions, '' I 've seen this before, do n't anything. And you gave me 6 months to live, and it ’ s the problem with me sir. Wife keeps hitting me on the shoulder and said: Excuse me miss, is bus. Her left, still nothing sperm Count as part of his physical exam ).
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